


you dont intend to do anything you say at all

by uchihakind



Category: Great Pretender (Anime)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, M/M, Other, Terminal Illnesses
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-21
Updated: 2020-12-24
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:09:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27130228
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/uchihakind/pseuds/uchihakind
Summary: Makoto Edamura is not a virgin
Relationships: Edamura Makoto/Reader, Makoto Edamura/Reader
Comments: 10
Kudos: 45





	1. rush hour

Makoto had met you in the hospital his mother stayed in, at a floor above in fact. Though he had been visiting the hospital nearly every day for months, it was on a particularly crazy day that he found himself on the wrong floor. 

\--

Kudo had run him into the ground with advertisements and sales, inadvertently barking up the wrong tree when trying to sell to someone who knew better than to allow themselves to be swindled. His effort on trying to ensnare a possible customer fell short, and resulted in Makoto running off to another part of town in an attempt to save his own ass. His fear eventually died out, but one look into the city’s horizon told him hospital visitor hours would be ending soon, and he needed to get to the facility- and fast.

He sighed, it was almost comical how awful that day had gone. 

The chocolate haired man made a mad dash to the hospital, his energy spilling out as he worked his legs harder and harder to check in with his mother. Of course he checked in with the front desk on time, he hadn’t run all that way for nothing, but a simple mispress of an elevator button had other plans for him. He was antsy, not paying attention, and eager to rush to his mother’s room. Upon hearing the ding and the familiar scrape of the elevator doors, he scrambled out with no second thoughts. Only, he collided with a fragile and frail form- you.

You were knocked flat on your ass, IV rack clattering to the floor. The needle in your arm yanked violently, eliciting a sharp gasp and a whimper from you.

“Are you okay?! Do you need help- I- I am so sorry, please, let me go get a nurse.”

The man on top of you was warm, sweaty, but warm nonetheless. It was the first time that someone besides a nurse or doctor had touched you. He was flustered, and wouldn’t stop apologizing, but all you could pay attention to was the throbbing in your arm and how handsome he was.

“Wow… you’re really cute.”

The words left your lips before you even realized they were being said, and you were met with an incredulous look.

“I- uh, have to go? I’ll get you a nurse on my way- goodbye!”

He was gone as quick as he came, leaving you on the floor. 

  
  


Makoto could feel his eyes bulging out of his head as he obsessively pressed the correct button. What the hell just happened? He was flushed from overexertion, but now that heat was coupled with the new found warmth in his cheeks that you’d brought him. He shook his head, collecting himself just enough to start cooling off. The elevator opened once more, and he successfully made his way to an ever familiar room.

“Sorry, I’m really late this time! You won’t believe the kind of day I had….”

\--

The tie around Makoto’s neck felt tighter today, but at least he’d be able to visit earlier than he usually does. Despite Kudo’s antics, he was a genuine boss and gave good hours. Anywho, the journey to the hospital was a lot more peaceful compared to yesterday. Well, that was until he was struck with the awful memory of crashing into you. It wasn’t  _ that  _ bad, just embarrassing. 

He walked in, freezing hospital air attacking him every which way, something he’d never truly grown accustomed to yet.

“Hi, I’m here to see-”

“Yup. Unfortunately, your mother is getting tests run and won’t be back in her room for another hour or so. You’re welcome to sit in the waiting room, or her room, if you’d like.”

“Oh, um… actually? Do you have a gift shop? There’s something I need to get.”

“Of course! It’s down the hall on the right,” the admitting nurse smiled.

“Thanks a bunch!”

Makoto took off down the gloomy halls of the hospital towards the colorful little shop. Good luck charms, colorful plushies and candies adorned the walls and mini tables of the place. 

_ A calico cat plush? _ It was cute, sure, but he didn’t even know if you liked cats…. Fuck it. It's the thought that counts.

He bought the damned over price thing with money he didn’t have, but his conscience weighed on him. He needed to apologize to you, he couldn’t just forget the pained noise you made. Regardless, Makoto made his way back to the common area.

“For your mother?” the desk lady asked.

“Ah, actually, no. There’s someone else here I need to see on the fourth floor.”

“The fourth floor…? Be quiet up there,” she says.

He smiles and nods, gingerly making his way into the elevator and departing. Only to realize he didn’t even know your fucking name. God. Makoto was an honest- well, maybe  _ honest _ wasn’t the right word-  _ complete _ idiot. He kept the smile plastered on his face, however, and eventually stepped out into the monochrome hall of the fourth floor. Despite the lighting, it felt dark- gloomy, almost hopeless. Then again, this hospital always held a gloom because his ill mother resided in it. 

“Where would they be?” he wondered. “They couldn’t have come from too far,” he deduced. The elevator was at the end of the hall, so your room had to be close if you were returning from it. 

Brisk footsteps joined his thoughts, however, followed by a taller man in a white coat.

“Do you have business here?”

“I-i’m looking for someone but I don’t know their room,” Makoto timidly confessed. 

A tap of the foot.

“O-oh but they’re a bit smaller than I am, and have (h/l) hair- and yesterday! Yesterday they had an IV...rack? I knocked it over and-”

“Their room is B2, but don’t be surprised if they’re asleep, he affirms.

“Thank you!” he squeaks out.

The doctor departs, entering the same elevator Makoto had just exited. Makoto himself grasps the stuffed cat and knocks lightly on the door before entering.

You’re not asleep, to his relief, but your back is facing him.

“Um, excuse me, it’s me. The guy from yesterday? I’m here to apologize.”

You slightly turn yourself from your position to look at him, and your eyes widen. 

“I brought you this, I’m not sure if you like cats though,” he scratches the back of his head.

You sit up this time, motioning for him to come closer. You shift on the bed, leaving room for him to sit, and pat the spot to let him know it’s okay to be next to you.

Makoto sits, unable to deny your offer, and hands you the cat he had picked out for you.

“Calicos are my mother’s favorite,” he tells you.

“Is she here?”

“Mhm. Floor three, but she’s busy with testing so I’m visiting you.”

“You don’t even know my name,” you look at him.

“I was hoping I could learn it,” he sheepishly confesses to you.

“I’m (y/n). (Y/n) (l/n).” 

“Pleasure to make your acquaintance. I’m Makoto Edamura.”

“Thanks for the cat, I guess. I’ve always wanted one as a kid, but pets aren’t allowed in hospitals, at least not in my room.”

“That’s too bad, my mother loves them. We had two of them back home, but ever since my mother fell sick I’ve had to rehome them.”

“What about your dad?”

He stiffens at the memory.

“Sorry,” you try to do damage control. “My parents aren’t around anymore so I’ve lost my sensitivity filter,” you claim.

“You’re all good, just tough memories. Bastard is in jail anyway.”

“Mm.”

“How old are you?”

“I’m eighteen.”

“Eighteen?! You mean you’re only two years younger than me?”

“Uh huh, but I’ve been in here for forever.”

“Do you get bored?”

“Sometimes, but I’ve been preoccupied with my phone and game consoles. The room gets boring, but I focus on my interests anyway.”

“I can visit you more if you’d like,” he suggests offhandedly, not thinking much of the promises it’d entail.

You forcefully move to face him at the proclamation. “Really?! You’d come visit me?”

Makoto is surprised at the sudden raising of your voice, but he couldn’t deny you now that he’s put the offer up in the air.

“Yeah, totally. I visit my mom every day, so, if I have time, I’ll come see you too. You said you have a phone right? Let’s exchange numbers!”

\--

Makoto walked home that day feeling ecstatic for the first time in a long time. He felt good because he gave you an over-priced, stuffed cat, and he felt great because he got your number and was able to tell his mom something positive for once. It was a rare moment of positivity from his seemingly endless life of darkness, and he’d take what he could from it.

…

His apartment was still solemn as ever. Unpacked boxes of his parent’s stuff sat in an abandoned corner of the living room, and few things adorned the suite as a whole. He had no time for decoration or really anything besides work. It was a shabby little place, but he still made sure to keep a few kitty memorabilia out for his mother’s awaited return. 

Makoto showered, still in his head about the day. The water was warm and inviting, blessedly gentle on the muscles that ached from yesterday’s activities. An actually  _ good _ day was had today, despite the emptiness in his wallet. 

Upon finishing his wash up, he readied for bed, hefty, cozy sheets inviting him in for sleep.

\---

The stuffed cat in your arms was nothing short of comforting. Hues of orange, black and white adorned the toy, with glimmering green eyes that gave your drab room 

_ Makoto Edamura, _ that was his name. He was still cute as you remembered, but more importantly, you felt flattered he even remembered your existence.  _ He came back for you _ . It was an uncommon occurrence, even nurses forgot your name. 

Though he’s a bit older than you, you found yourself smiling at the idea of forming a new friendship with him. He seemed he could relate to you enough. Makoto wasn’t sick himself, but he had no issues taking care of his sick mother- you couldn’t be that much more of a hassle, right? Then again, he clearly had a lot on his plate, so maybe befriending you wasn’t that good of an idea.

It wasn’t like you couldn’t leave your room, in fact, you had free reign to do pretty much whatever you wanted. But, due to your illness, it wasn’t recommended that you leave that often. Besides, you had nowhere to go anyway as you had no friends- well now you have Makoto, but, ever since you were taken out of school, you’ve been all alone. Your parents had transferred their jobs to America to cover you medical bills, but that took away all physical contact with them. Calls were fine, sure, but you’d be a liar to say you didn’t miss them being  _ with _ you. 

The hospital really wasn’t too bad, you didn’t lie to Makoto when you told him. It just got boring, and the isolation and treatments were tiring. Maybe if you begged him enough, he’d take you outside of these walls. You’d even pay! Online jobs were easier to get than you expected, and you really only spent money on things for your handheld console anyway. Things could really only go up from here, right?


	2. ねーねー、だいじょうぶですか。

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More stuff soon I swear !

The stuffed cat in your arms was nothing short of comforting. Hues of orange, black and white adorned the toy, with glimmering green eyes that gave your drab room 

_ Makoto Edamura, _ that was his name. He was still cute as you remembered, but more importantly, you felt flattered he even remembered your existence.  _ He came back for you _ . It was an uncommon occurrence, even nurses forgot your name. 

Though he’s a bit older than you, you found yourself smiling at the idea of forming a new friendship with him. He seemed he could relate to you enough. Makoto wasn’t sick himself, but he had no issues taking care of his sick mother- you couldn’t be that much more of a hassle, right? Then again, he clearly had a lot on his plate, so maybe befriending you wasn’t that good of an idea.

It wasn’t like you couldn’t leave your room, in fact, you had free reign to do pretty much whatever you wanted. But, due to your illness, it wasn’t recommended that you leave that often. Besides, you had nowhere to go anyway as you had no friends- well now you have Makoto, but, ever since you were taken out of school, you’ve been all alone. Your parents had transferred their jobs to America to cover you medical bills, but that took away all physical contact with them. Calls were fine, sure, but you’d be a liar to say you didn’t miss them being  _ with _ you. 

The hospital really wasn’t too bad, you didn’t lie to Makoto when you told him. It just got boring, and the isolation and treatments were tiring. Maybe if you begged him enough, he’d take you outside of these walls. You’d even pay! Online jobs were easier to get than you expected, and you really only spent money on things for your handheld console anyway. Things could really only go up from here, right?

-

The next time Makoto visited you was four days after your initial meeting, three days after your second. His light knock had you upright in a heartbeat, and you squirmed around in an attempt to settle yourself decently. Makoto came in, seemingly tired, and he found purchase in the empty spot next to you. 

“Long day?” you asked.

“Yeah, I guess you could say that,” he laughed a bit.

“Hmm… if you don’t mind me asking, Edamura-san-”

“You can call me Makoto.”

“ _ Makoto.  _ What do you do all day?”

“I work at a tea company,” he smiled at that.

“Does it pay well?”

“Oh yeah, it definitely does. My boss is amazing at negotiation,” he snorts.

You’re a bit confused at why he’s laughing, but you don’t press further.

“Say, (y/n)? Do you, I don’t know, wanna go do something? It can’t be good to keep you holed up in this room all the time.”

Makoto swore your eyes sparkled

“I would love to! Oh but… I have to ask before I leave, but you’ll come with me to ask, right?”

“Sure thing.”

\---

Stepping out of the hospital had you ecstatic. Of course, you’d never express it so childishly like your brain was, but you were joyful nonetheless.

"Say, Makoto?"

He looks down to your taller form as the two of you walk 

"Uh… where are we going?"

"Well I was going to take you out to eat, unless you don't want to?"

"Oh, um, of course! I'd love too, but nowhere too expensive, okay? I'm kind of broke," you say to him, albeit a bit embarrassed.

"Nah I totally get how you feel. Don't worry, I've got you," his smile is pure and genuine.

Makoto took a brief note of how sickly you were in comparison to him. His healthy complexion made you appear ghastly, and your short and thinner stature had him nearly tower over you. Even if he was a grown man, he was just barely five-foot-six. 

He knew better than to ask you of your ailment, but he wouldn't deny his curiosity. 

"(Y/N)? Where is that rack thing I knocked over that one time?"

You look at him with a perplexed expression.

"It was an IV rack. I had been in quite a bit of pain the day you knocked me over, so they hooked me up."

Makoto felt rocks hit his stomach. You were already in pain that day, and he  _ had _ to go and knock you over, then meddle in your life even more afterward? He felt stupid, even moreso, he felt disrespectful. 

You must have noticed the drop in his expression, because your small hand lightly gripped his sleeve.

"Don't worry about it, I'm okay now. The cat was enough compensation."

\---

Spare days of hanging out turned to weeks, and then to months. Lingering touches of the shoulder, or one another's hands. Makoto would be a liar to say he hadn't grown to like you. 

After multiple visits, you had opened up to him immensely. Your eyes brightened every time he entered your room, and the two of you had respective places to lay on your bed. Despite the slight age difference, the two of you got along pretty well.

Makoto didn't take you out much, though. It wasn't that he didn't want to, but it was that he couldn't. His mother's medical bills took up most of his capital, and besides, paying the bills was the whole reason he got the job in the first place. With his father out of the picture, he had a lot to handle on his own. 

Regardless, today would be the day that Makoto confessed to you.


	3. I hope we're still friends, yeah I hope you don't mind

Kudo couldn’t help but notice the brightness in his subordinate’s eyes today. A light smile beheld the younger man’s face, and of course, Kudou _had_ to pry.

“What’s got you all smiles, today?” he asked, a smirk sliding onto his features.

“Me?” Makoto questioned, innocently.

“Yeah, you! What? You gotta girlfriend or something?” Kudo’s eyebrows raised at his own question.

“Hmm…Something like that,” Makoto grinned.

“Really?! You gotta tell me about ‘em, you casanova!” Kudo nearly jumped on him. 

. . .

Outside of your hospital door, Makoto straightened his tie. A deep breath escaped him as he prepared himself to enter. He knocked, as per usual, and entered your room.

To his surprise, you were curled up under your personal comforter, unmoving. Soft sniffles, and heavy breaths accompanied your form, however, and it caused Makoto’s confident smile to drop from his face.

He made his steps quick, and wasn’t at all hesitant to try to console your trembling form. Makoto knelt beside you, and placed a light hand on your covered shoulder.

“Hey, hey, (y/n), what’s wrong? What’s got you upset, love?”

The tender nickname made you still. 

You wriggle a bit, and flip to face him.

Makoto notes the tears that streak your face, and how your eyelashes clump together as a result. Despite being a crumpled, tear-stained mess, he still finds you beautiful. Instinctively, his hand reaches to cup your face.

Truth be told it surprised the both of you, but now wasn’t the time to address it.

“Th-they told me I can’t stay in the hospital any longer,” your hand snakes up to grip the wrist of the one that holds your face, “I don’t have anywhere to go, Makoto.”

Makoto is still. You _really_ don’t have anywhere to go. You’re 18, and your parents are in America for Christ’s sake. You were essentially being evicted.

“I still need treatment, but since I’m not, well, an immediate case, they need my room for more patients,” you sniffle. 

“You can come live with me!” Makoto blurts out. A heavy, red blush bleeds into his face immediately after the thought. _God, I’m an idiot! Why did I say that!? They won’t want to move in with someone they met a few months ago…._

You prop yourself up some at this.

“Really!? I-i can’t even offer you anything, I mean, I guess I could work from home and help but… are you sure?”

“Um, uh, yes, of course. You’re a friend in need.” _A friend… yeah, a friend. Sigh._

“I don’t have anyone else anyway. I feel safe with you Makoto. I’ll make sure to not burden you, I promise!” 

“My mom stays here at the hospital, and with my dad gone, there isn’t anyone but me. The change of pace will be nice,” he assures you.

\--

Makoto’s apartment was small, but then again, it really was only meant for one person to live in. Though, there was certainly enough space for you. And if there wasn’t, Makoto would’ve made some.

His futon was draped in a duvet, adorned with an additional blanket in case it got extra cold. 

“You, uh, you can sleep there. I can take the floor?”

“No way, Makoto, that’s your bed. You should be the one using it, I’m not the one who values sleep. You have a job to upkeep.”

“You’re the sick one, (y/n),” he reasoned.

“Then why don’t we share? It wouldn’t be the first time,” you assert.

  
  


_That was true…. Makoto had had quite the day at his job before he made his daily visit to you. His exhaustion was clear, and you had wondered why he even bothered visiting you if he was so tired._

_“Woah, Makoto. You look… really worn out there,” you state, a bit concerned at his disheveledness._

_“‘M just a bit tired is all.”_

_You adjusted yourself to make enough room for the older man, and he plopped himself in the spot._

_A smile met your face at this, it was kinda cute, honestly. Your fingers lightly combed through his hair, and it wasn’t long before the boyish man was fast asleep._

  
  


The two of you mulled the memory over, albeit Makoto remembered it _vaguely_ , given he was asleep almost the entire visit.

“Well, if you’re comfortable with it, then I suppose I can’t say no to sleeping in my own bed,” he affirms.

“Cool! Uh, where should I put my stuff?”

“Oh? You can put it anywhere for now, we’ll situate it later when we’re able to.”

\--

Undressing in Makoto's bathroom to shower had you a blushing mess. He couldn't see you, obviously, but the thought of being naked in his house embarassed you. 

His shower was small, as expected for an apartment housing one man, but it was comfortable. Luckily, his soaps were nice, also something you expected, given that the man smelled heavenly on days he was close to you.

You stepped in under the running water, warmth enveloping you rather immediately. You wouldn't linger too long.

-

Nervously, you re-entered Makoto's room. He was sat on his bed, small cup of tea in hand. He was reading something on his phone, skimming over whatever showed up on his screen. He didn't notice your presence until you placed yourself next to him. 

"Uh...hi?"

"Oh. Welcome back, uh, how was your shower?"

"Oh! It was super nice, the water pressure here is amazing compared to the hospital," you sighed.

"I'm glad you enjoyed it, then," he smiled, "I'm gonna go brush my teeth and come back. Feel free to get comfortable."

You nodded, and the man got up and left to do his business.

Observing the futon you had sat on, you shuffle about it a bit, opting to slip under the covers, pushing yourself into the wall.

Makoto returns soon after his original departure, offering a small wave when he sees you. He dims the light of the room, and makes his way over.

He too slips under the covers.

"Can I hold you?" Makoto says, face ablaze. 

"Ah, um, sure actually. I'm kinda cold," you sheepishly agreed. 

His arms slither around your body, pulling you to him. His chin rests on your head, and your head rests on his chest. Despite feeling a bit nervous, you relax into him.

Makoto sighs, an internal conflict ongoing in his mind. Should he inform you of his feelings, or should he play it safe and keep your friendship intact?

He wants to bite the bullet, so he does.

"Hey, (Y/N), are you still awake?"

A tired noise leaves you, so he continues.

"I was going to tell you this the day you got basically evicted, but… You were so distressed it didn't seem appropriate..."

A hand came up to tug and toy with your hair. Carding his fingers through the soft strands as if to calm the both of you down.

"...I, look, (y/n), I have feelings for you. You don't have to answer or say anything, but I really had to put it out there."

Your grip on him tightened, to Makoto's own delight.

"I like you too, Makoto. I don't know how I wouldn't at this point. You're everything to me."

He doesn't respond with words, but rather moves to kiss the top of your head instead. 

"Goodnight, (Y/N), thank you."

  
  



End file.
